A challenge from a friend: 5 movies I found scary/upsetting/disturbing.
A challenge from a friend: 5 movies I found scary/upsetting/disturbing.
Another school semester will soon begin. If you’re in school, are you looking forward to starting classes? If you’re out of school, what do you miss about it — or are you glad those days are over? — The Daily Post
Recently, I found one of these questionnaires on Tumblr. I haven’t done one of these since high school, and now as I do it, I find myself going, “I took these questions a lot more seriously ten years ago. Now they seem kind of…silly.”
So I guess I miss the sense of endlessness in school. I miss the free time. I miss the ability to take things so desperately seriously. I miss the feeling of having your heart so full that if someone touches it the wrong way, it would burst in a horrible explosion of viscera and emotional devastation. I miss that sensation that the most difficult decision you were going to make that day was saying ‘hello’ to someone you liked.
Also, here’s my questionnaire.
1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?
Ha! Lord, no. A husband is enough.
2.When did your last hug take place?
Today. In my house. With aforementioned husband.
3.Are you a jealous person?
I used to be, and maybe sometimes I think, “What I wouldn’t give for that person’s time/money/freedom/dog.” But recently I’ve been working on living more in the moment, and part of that is not comparing what you have with what someone else has.
4.Are you tired right now?
A little. I’m getting there. Most nights I take a sleep aid just so I don’t stay up all night. This night owl needs neutering.
5.Do you chew on your straws?
No. I do play with them, though. I’ll move it up and cap it with my finger so I trap the liquid inside, and drink it that way.
6.Have you ever been called a tease?
Ha, yeah. Boys are weird.
7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
I don’t believe so. I get to a certain point of delirium around 20-some hours, and although I’ve managed to pull all-nighters, I usually end up loosing my mind and there are just these missing gaps of time…
8.Do you cry easily?
Yes. Certain songs, movies, thoughts will reduce me to a blubbering mess. Luckily, I’m usually alone when this happens.
9.What should you be doing right now?
I should be going to bed.
10.Are you a heavy sleeper?
Absolutely. I shared an efficiency with my boyfriend in college, and he was always eager to have people over. I got very used to sleeping through company, parties, drinking…even a guy who came in with a broken nose.
11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?
If I got into another relationship at this point, I highly doubt it. From where I currently stand, though, I don’t think I’ll ever not be married.
12.Are you mad at someone right now?
Nope. Feeling groovy.
13.Do you believe in love?
I believe in love like I believe that we are all bits of stardust. It’s hard to imagine, but when you stop and think about it…it makes sense. It exists.
14.What makes you laugh no matter what?
Goats yelling like humans. Every time.
15.Who was the last person you talked to?
My husband and his best friend, who he was talking to on Google Hangout.
16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?
No, but he’s been getting yellow jackets in his room. Does that count?
17.Will you get married?
18.When was the last time you smiled?
A little while ago. I made a brownie. It was delicious.
19.Does anyone like you?
Uh. Yeah. A lot of people. I remember these questions being more difficult in high school…
20.Do you secretly like someone?
Nope. I tend to yell that in people’s faces every chance I get.
21.Who was the first person you talked to today?
I’m tired of saying “my husband” so after that, it was my Mom. And my sister, who she was driving to work.
22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
Most recently, my pal Jenn, who is the fiancee of my husband’s BFF.
23.What are you NOT looking forward to?
Going to bed. Definitely.
24.What ARE you looking forward to?
I just got a plane ticket to fly home for my birthday. I am stoked.
25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?
Yeah. Frequently, in fact. I feel there is a generational relevance that is lacking here…
26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?
Make an inappropriate comment. My favorite is still from this moment, when I was in college, and these two friends of mine were making out hardcore in the kitchen. And when I started to hear it, I said really loudly, “Man, that must be one stuck jar of pickles.” Ruined the moment completely, and they both practically fell out of the kitchen, laughing.
27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?
Maybe. You never know.
28.Are you a forgiving person?
Absolutely. A forgetting person? Meehh…
29.How many TRUE friends do you have?
At least THIS many.
30.Do you fall for people easily?
Oh, yeah. I also tumble, trip and splat for people, and it’s never that hard.
31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?
Have you ever fallen for your ex’s mom’s best friend? BURN.
32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?
Um. Brownie. Remember, we talked about this. It was delicious.
33.Who was the last person you drove with?
Neil Gaiman. I was listening to “M is for Magic.”
34.How late did you stay up last night and why?
I stayed up until about 10:30 because I got distracted writing.
35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Definitely. I have a laundry list of places I’d love to live for a year or so.
36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?
I don’t take many pictures of people, but I did take a picture of my Loot Crate and a bag of sexy stuff from Pure Romance.
37.Can you live a day without TV?
38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
When I watched the season finale for True Blood. Lame.
39.Three names you go by..
Kate, Katie and Katherine. Notice a trend?
40.Are you currently in a relationship?
Guys. Married. Geez.
41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Shut up, it’s totally a romance movie.
42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
43.What’s your current problem?
Paying off my debts. Yuck.
44.Have you ever had your heart broken?
Heart, no. Wrist, yes.
45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?
They’re great. I absolutely recommend having at least one.
46.How many kids do you want to have?
HA. GOOD ONE.
47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?
No. In fact, never be afraid to tell someone you like them. If they react like a dick, they don’t deserve to be liked because they are awful people (you can forgive them at your reunion in 10-15 years). When you’re young and constantly around people, it’s really easy to think that only certain people can like you. When you get older, you should give love as good as you get it.
“When the full moon happens, you turn into a person who’s the opposite of who you normally are. Describe this new you.” — Daily Post for August 20, 2013
I straighten up
Head back, chest forward
The only colors on me are the ones that look good on me, or so I’ve heard:
Pastels, pinks, greens
An hour early, I’m up to do my hair,
My makeup must be perfect
How could anyone see me looking less than chiseled, polished, prepped?
I do as I’m told
Everything is early to bed, early to rise
There’s some free time at the end of the day, sure,
But I’m not going anywhere
Not when my family is at home waiting for me
I am the perfect cookie-cutter wife/mother/partner
Submitting to the mold that’s for me
Only appropriate, only proper, only in daylight
Because at night, after dishes are done and everybody is in bed
I go out, and I’m a street fighter
Bashing brains in, letting all that Mrs. Manicured, Mrs. Gee Whiz Okeydokey
Tear out a motherfucker’s throat
I am feared and loved
The cunt of your nightmares
Because there is nothing more pure and beautiful and terrifying
Than white-hot, white-gold fury that manifests itself
And when the sun comes up, I wake up
Because my hair is still perfectly coiffed
Except for somebody’s tooth caught in a ringlet.
What would your dark side be like? Would it really be so dark or just…different?
We all have things as need to do to keep an even keel — blogging, exercising, reading, cooking. What’s yours? http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/19/daily-prompt-activity/
“I’m going to put my ears in.”
“Ears” is a term I learned at my current day job a few years ago. It’s short for earbuds or a headset of some sort. It used to sound awkward, odd. How can you put your ears in? But after some time, I took up this piece of pidgin…along with many types of ears. I have about 10 different types of earbuds, and my prized possession is a set of large, sound-cancelling headphones with the color scheme of R2D2.
I don’t get a lot of time alone these days. And I’m working on slowly changing that, but there are a lot of moments where that isn’t an option. You see, I work from home. So does my husband. My writing career and other hobbies also make me a bit of a homebody, and there are some parts of the week where my partner is the only person I interact with.
But when I really have to hone in? When I really just need to be nestled inside the bubble of my own space and focus – or, better yet, zone out entirely, flick the auto-pilot button and sit back – I put my ears in. I make a date with Audible or Damien Rice or Netflix or a podcast or even just let the white noise simulate a rainstorm, waves, airplane noise, and it’s like all the entrances and exits inside my head have been closed off.
I’ve barricade the door.
I’ve closed off the escape hatch.
I think we’re alone now.
Remember that post yesterday?
3. Attack on Titan.
4. Welcome to Night Vale.
5. Frozen yogurt.
Yup. It’s that kind of day, folks.
Today, a fellow writer friend of mine posted this article written by a UVA English professor. In it, he discusses why it is important for those of the currently matriculating crowd to consider a major in the same field of study I did 10 years ago. “All students—and I mean all—ought to think seriously about majoring in English,” he says. “Becoming an English major means pursuing the most important subject of all—being a human being.”
I can’t imagine what it must be like for kids going on to college these days. Granted, there’s always been a bias against this “useless degree” (which I pay homage to in the title of this post) but the screaming message of the masses today seems to be, “If you don’t get a college education in something that will get you a job with benefits effective the day after your graduation, you’re going to die.”
I moved to Pittsburgh literally after I graduated. I found a job within a week and immediately had a bit of a nervous breakdown. I jumped around to a few other positions, and soon I had a laundry list of experience. This seemed like a good thing, right?
The day I knew times were a-changin’ was in 2009. I was trying to get another job and had succeeded in getting a telephone interview. The HR representative asked me a few of the generic interview questions before getting to something I wasn’t expecting: “According to your resume, I see you have worked for two companies in the past two years. Why is that?”
I almost laughed – just almost – because I couldn’t imagine why someone would ask me why I didn’t stay at a job. I hadn’t been fired – if I had been, I would have expected some inquiry. But no, instead I was being asked why I wasn’t still working for the same company.
I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I know what I didn’t say. I didn’t say, “Because I wasn’t happy.” I didn’t say, “Because I felt called to do something bigger with my life.” I didn’t say, “Because I wanted a change.” And obviously you can never say, “Because I want more money.” And it doesn’t matter what I did say, because at that point – I realized after the fact – the interview was over.
The American world is such now that the highest premium is placed on settling down and getting comfy. The message is short and sour: get somewhere you can tolerate, put your head down and make some money. Eventually you might be able to do something worthwhile but not until you’re debt-free. You folks looking for a college education? If you don’t get it in something useful, you’re a burden to the system.
I am so grateful for my opportunity to be an English major. When I stop too long and think a little too hard about my years in Richmond, I get this horrible, nauseous nostalgic squeeze around my heart because it was truly the years that defined me as a person, good and bad. Despite everything that was happening to me socially at that time, I always knew I was pursuing my passion and something I wanted to study.
I just want to hug all the young people who are facing the pressure to head into a program they feel like they have to be in. I want to reassure them that it’s going to be okay, that they’ll be fine if they do something different. I want to shake all the people who keep putting out those toxic articles about the rise of debt and the mistakes being made by anyone looking for an education and how lazy and self-absorbed young people are these days. God, it’s no wonder there’s such an epidemic of stress-related and mental illnesses.
Most of all, though, I’d like to tell Mark Edmundson that he’s right and to thank him for his article. If only there was more inspiring voices like his.
I had a lot of fun making this one. It’s different, but I like it a lot.
Yesterday, that picture I did from the Last Unicorn got reblogged by Peter S. Beagle’s official Tumblr. Holy shit, guys. Do you even know the noises I made?*
Understandably, my Tumblr went…kind of insane. And in doing so, I got to take a look at the old site, and I realized…I really, really love Tumblr.
So I wrote about it here and you should read it. I feel it’s only appropriate that my little letter stay on Tumblr, otherwise it would be kind of like giving that note about being someone’s prom date to someone other than that person. Don’t worry, you don’t need a Tumblr to view it, but afterwards you might just want one. And I’m not even being paid to say that.**
*To summarize, it was kind of like how Spielberg spliced together a bunch of different animals to make the T-Rex roars in Jurassic Park. In this case, it was like…a dolphin, a howler monkey, a colicky baby and Michael Jackson.
**Call me maybe?